1950' Household

This 1955 article from Housekeeping Monthly

* Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favorite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.

* Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.

* Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it. * Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. * Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc... and then run a dustcloth over the tables.

* Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

* Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimise all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.

* Be happy to see him.

* Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

* Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

* Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.

* You goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.

* Don't greet him with complaints and problems.

* Don't complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.

* Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

* Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.

* Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.

* A good wife always knows her place.

Forgiveness

forgiveness:

act of forgiving; state of being forgiven.

disposition or willingness to forgive.

Use Forgiveness in a Sentence

See images of Forgiveness

Search Forgiveness on the Web

1. Forgiving is allowing another person to be human for faults, mistakes, or misdeeds. Forgetting is putting these behind you; they are no longer brought up and no longer remain a barrier to your relationship.

2. Forgiving is letting another know that there is no grudge, hard feelings, or animosity for any wrongdoing. Forgetting is the lack of further discussion, with no ongoing negative references to the event.

3. Forgiving is letting the other person know that you accept as genuine the remorse and sorrow for actions or words that hurt or disappointed you. Forgetting is promising that this deed, whether of omission or commission, will not be brought up again.

4. Forgiving is accepting the sincerity of penance, sorrow, and regret expressed over a grievous personal offense; making it sufficient to clear the air. Forgetting is your commitment to let go of anger, hurt, and pain over this offense.

5. Forgiving is giving a sign that a person's explanation or acceptance of blame for a destructive, hurtful, or painful act is fully accepted. Forgetting is the development of a plan of action between the two of you to heal the scars resulting from the behavior.

6. Forgiving is the highest form of human behavior that can be shown to another person. It is the opening up of yourself to that person to be vulnerable to being hurt or offended in the future, yet setting aside this in order to reopen and heal the channels of communication. Forgetting is equally as high a human behavior; it is letting go of the need to seek revenge for past offenses.

7. Forgiving is the act of love between you and a person who has hurt you; the bandage that holds the wound together long enough to heal. Forgetting is also an act of love; in rehabilitation therapy, helping the wounded return to a full, functional, living reality.

8. Forgiving is the God like gift of spiritually connecting with others, touching their hearts to calm the fear of rejection, quiet the sense of failure, and lighten the burden of guilt. Forgetting is the God like gift of spiritually touching others' hearts with the reassurance of a happy and full life with no fear of recrimination, remonstrations, or reminding of past offenses.

9. Forgiving is the act of letting go of temporary ill will, disappointment, or the disgust that arises from the break in your relationship. Forgetting is bridging this gap in the relationship, eventually strengthening it against such a break in the future.

10. Forgiving is an act of compassion, humanity, and gentleness by which you let another know that she/he is indeed a child of the universe upon whom a variety of graces and blessings have been showered and that current or past offenses need not be a barrier preventing goodness and worth to shine through. Forgetting is the act of encouragement, support, and reinforcement by which you assist the other person to rebuild, reconnect and re-establish a loving, caring, healthy relationship with you, others, and the world whereby gifts, talents, and skills are freely appreciated and shared.

It had been my 8th grade year in junior high. At the end of the school year my father took a new job and we moved 3 hours away. It was hard having a long distance relationship. Especially when I moved to a new school. I was naive and shallow in my younger years, and I was popular at my new school.

I would often go to visit my grandmother to see Cory and my friends. Then all of a sudden Cory just stopped calling me and writing me letters. I tried to contact him but his phone number was changed. I tried writing to my best friend but couldn't get a hold of him. So several months passed and I heard nothing I just assumed they wanted nothing more to do with me. So I moved on slowly.

I made new friends, got a new boyfriend. Then for thanksgiving I went to visit my grandmother and thought I would go see them. No one was there. I didn't understand why they would just up and leave and tell me nothing. Finally when I returned I got a phone call. I will never forget that phone call.

My mother handed me the phone and it was Cory's grandmother. All I heard from her was, "its all your fault, you did this to him you little bitch!" I was confused I didn't understand what was going on. So I handed the phone back to my mother. She talked to the woman and then my mother turned and told me Cory had died.

The next few days were a blur. I didn't go to school, hardly ate anything. I was broken hearted. I for so long thought he wanted nothing to do with me. I had received that phone call 5 months after the day Cory and Erin stopped writing or calling me. His family blamed me for it, because I was friends with Erin.

Erin and Cory became good friends through me. The night Cory had died they had gone hunting. Foolish as kids were they were high off marijuana. It had been a hunting accident when Cory was shot. Somehow the gun malfunctioned, a 12 gauge shot gun, and had shot Cory in the back. Erin was immediately arrested and put into a group home for teenage boys.

He later went to court and was convicted of Involuntary Manslaughter. I didn't get to see my friend hardly for three years. We wrote everyday, and talked as often as we could. That day changed him completely as it did me. His family to this day still blames me. Why I do not know but they do. I loved him, he was my first and I will always remember him.

You are wondering why this story is in place with forgiveness? Erin came to me one day and broke down. Crying he told me he was sorry, and that he wanted forgiveness from me. What he didn't know was I never blamed him to begin with. I had forgiven him for anything he felt he needed the forgiveness for and tried to tell him to forgive himself.

So in trying to help my friend overcome his grief, and to pull him from the dark whole he felt he was in, I researched forgiveness. The ten steps mentioned above come from a website. Its like an AA program a 12 step program. I had joined this with him a long time ago so he could somehow overcome what he needed. I joined it with him to give him moral support.

We have a promise to each other to get tattoos. Matching ones that will have Cory's name in it. When I get a scanner I will upload it and show you, since I drew it.

Forgiveness is not always the easy thing. You may have been hurt so bad by someone but if someone comes to you for forgiveness you should never deny it to them. Even if you truly don't forgive them. They seek forgiveness for their conscience not your own. You should be the better person. No one is every saying forget what they did, but forgiving them, letting them know yes they hurt you but you still care and love them is what matters.

Many people hold grudges and anger and it eats them. It takes away the very core of what makes them a good person and leaves them a bitter empty shell of nothingness. I know, because I used to be one of them. I blamed everything that ever happened to me on my mother. She may have done things that I felt were wrong, and hurt me, but she did the best she could in raising me. I in return was not an easy child to raise. After Cory died I lost who I was. Drugs and alcohol became my life as well as sexual release.

Several bad boyfriends, and really scary incidents later in my life made me wake up. I gave forgiveness to those who truly finally needed it, but most of all the person I need to work on forgiving is myself. There may be things in my life that were not my fault, but I feel they were. I myself must forgive myself and let them go.

I hope this has enlightened people. It is something I am reluctant to talk about. I miss Cory very much, but I am thankful that I still have Erin in my life. He is like my big brother. I love him dearly. I hope that if you have anyone in your life that is seeking forgiveness from you, that you give it to them before it's to late.

Jealousy

Jealousy

October 1, 2006

Lately, I have heard or read a lot about how slaves should check to see if another slave is collared to or interested in a particular free man before serving him, so as to avoid stepping on another slave's toes.

This has been discussed both with regard to cyber interaction and interaction in real life.

The thing I have to ask is WHY should a slave be more concerned about pleasing another slave than pleasing the free?

It's actually pretty common at Gorean gatherings (I'm talking real life here) for girls to be petted or sit in the laps for a while of other masters besides their own.. Much like at the dog park everyone pets all the other dogs and stuff. It is also rather common for girls to serve free people other than their owners in other ways, dependent on the rules of those who own them, of course. Realistically, we (slaves) don't have any business getting upset because our masters or masters we are interested in are also paying attention to other girls in whatever capacity. It is their right as free men and our place as slaves to be pleasing.

Jealousy is a luxury of the free. It isn't permitted (at least outwardly) to slaves.

Something that I have learned to do when the green eyed monster wants to rear its head is step back and looks at it another way... When another girl is sitting at Master's feet or snuggled up with him.. Or passionately kissing him or more.. Yes, sometimes I do feel some jealousy.. But the thing that I try to remember is that he is being pleased.. And that should be my primary focus.

So I will look at the fact that he is happy and try to be grateful to the girl for helping me to keep him happy. And I have also discovered that making FRIENDS with the other girls makes them a lot more likely to be sensitive to my feelings as well, and they will be right there at my side if I'm feeling a little neglected or unwanted to remind me that *I* am the one who shares his bed and his home, and to tell me about how he looks at me or talks about me. To tell me how obvious it is that he loves me..

If I had automatically classified these other girls as competition or "the enemy" I would have sold myself short in the friend department AND displeased Master! How sad that would have been!

One last thing to remember...

We don't have a *right* to serve our masters or any free in anything, let alone all things.

It is a privilege.

A privilege that can be taken away just as surely as it is given, should we show ourselves unable to remember our place.

Many a jealous girl has found herself sleeping on the kitchen floor and scrubbing pots while her more pleasing and less jealous sister enjoys her master's bed and arms *instead* of, rather than in addition to her.

We slaves would do well to keep these things in mind always!

© Khaos WolfKat 2006

　

Jealousy–noun, plural -ous⋅ies for 4.

Jealous resentment against a rival, a person enjoying success or advantage, etc., or against another's success or advantages itself.

Mental uneasiness from suspicion of fear of rivalry, unfaithfulness, etc., as in love or aims.

Vigilance in maintaining or guarding something.

A jealous feeling, disposition, state, or mood.

I wanted to talk a little today about jealousy, and what I have always thought. I as a slave experienced this emotion, and as of late I have been experiencing it much more these days. It may not be permitted or becoming of a slave to show this emotion, but it in no way does not just disappear.

A slave cannot just shut down her emotions. She feels them all. It’s what gives them the will to do some of the things they do. Now granted it is not wise for a woman, a slave to express to her Master that she is jealous of another slave.

At the same time a slave cannot hide anything from her Master. So either way she is at a disposition. By slave law she must never hide anything from her Master, and at the same time must never displease him. Some slaves, especially inexperienced ones take all the words Master's speak to heart.

To be honest, there are so many men out there that call themselves Masters who well aren't. This girl means no disrespect to the Free, but she has to admit. Most men that claim to be Masters are just horny men after control, to have a girl at their side whenever they need to cum. So ladies be careful.

It takes a long time to truly know a Master. A slave must learn her Master as he learns her. If you have a true Master then he would not punish you for speaking your heart. He would encourage you to talk about how you feel, and what’s important to you.

Sadly most men aren't this way. Most would punish you. So you must release information at your discretion, and hope that it comes out in a pleasing manner. Often times if you are jealous of another slave girl, if she is or is not owned by your Master then he will often just laugh.

He will generally say you have nothing to fear, but since you told him you were jealous he would most likely leave you, or tell you to toughen up and get over it. I've had those experiences in the past. I even had one man tell me I had no choice, which I had to love my chain sister?

The funny thing is no I don't. He may command me to love her, and well I could if I chose to be a great actress. I could love her and be kind to her in his presence, but behind closed doors at the end of the day we are just two slaves, equal to one another and she had better hope she has a bigger stick and a faster whip.

It is said in Gor that Master's turn their eyes away from the squabbles of slaves. That is beneath them to get involved. Well, I honestly feel most of the Gorean men did it for a reason. Goreans aren't the nicest of people. They enjoy amusement, and what’s more amusing then watching two slaves fight over you. It’s disgusting.

I am not here to serve a slave, I am here to please my Master. Master's let this girl give you some advice. A happy slave serves better. Now, I am not saying spoil her and treat her like a queen. Don't, but don't neglect her, don't disrespect her and don't treat her like dirt. I guarantee that the moment you start doing these things she will find another Master to fill the void.

I may be a slave, but I am not ignorant. I may be a slave but I won’t sit back and watch my Master be stolen from me. I may be a slave but I can guarantee I will beat the daylights out of you should you try it. I may be a slave but no whip, no punishment would stop me from hurting you.

Never come between a girl and her Master. Especially if that slave and that Master are in love. My favorite saying in all of Gor:

I was the only girl in his compartments. I well understood the meaning of this. He had chosen the perfection of one man, the complete Master, and one woman the total slave. It is called the perfect bondage,, each all and perfect to the other.

It is right for some men, and not for others. Much depends on whether the man has met his perfect slave, and the woman her perfect Master.

Page 442 Slave Girl of Gor

So for all those Masters who think that power comes from a chain, from having more than one slave to do what you want. A lesson to you. You will never be happy. You will never feel the love of a true slave. You will always be in the middle of squabbles of slaves who fight over you. I feel sorry for you. I hope and pray that you will one day experience the true love of a slave, and the true bond between a Master and a slave....A SLAVE. Not SLAVES!!!!

This girl has spoken her peace, and yes it sounds angry but this girl wanted some of this information for both slaves and Master's. Slaves protect yourselves. Your duty is first to your heart, and then your Master. Always remember that!

Keep in mind, I used to kneel, and serve, and be the part of the slave girl. I was never a submissive, not when I knelt, I was a Gorean slave girl. So with all that I have learned; I am ready to leave Gor. The role-play of it, the slave part of it. I am ready to stand, wear my veils, and be just that a Mistress. I know what the whip feels like, so I now know what I can dish out. What I know most of all, is that the one who chooses to kneel for me, gives me that power. Should I abuse it, they will take it away.

The Olive Tree

The Olive Tree

A confused sub came before a wise Master who adored her. She felt that to submit to him would mean she would open her heart to unbearable pain should he ever leave her. She hungered for him and needed him, but was ready to walk away in panic.

The gentle Master knelt her before him and started a tale of love and devotion. As she looked up at him his arms began to widen and open like a large tree stretches its branches to the sky. At that moment the Master appeared rooted to the floor and his impressive size towered above her like a giant tree. Then he began to speak...

I'm here for you... now and always no matter how far time and space takes us... Whether you walk away from me today or you stay and serve me I will not turn from you. I am as patient as time itself; I will take not from you unless you give freely and completely of yourself, but I give onto you regardless-- for my love is unconditional...

Like the olive tree that can both feed you and shade you, I am there seemingly eternal to your short life on this earth. If you need my fruit to feed your hunger I will give you all the fruit you need. If your skin grows dry and loses its luster, the oil from my fruit will restore it and make it glisten. When you need comfort my leaves will gently caress your face with the slightest breeze. When you need discipline my branches will correct you when the wind blows strong. If you just need my shade to protect you from the sun, my branches will shade and protect you. If you need warmth at night my fallen branches will fuel the fire to keep you warm and safe. If you need a refreshing breeze my leaves will fan you and cool you. You are my gardener.

When you submit to me, you tend that which keeps me vibrant and full of life. When you kneel under me and till the soil, you give breath to my roots. When you water me, my sap flows strong through me raising my limping Branches. When you soil yourself collecting fertilizer with your bare hands, you strengthen and humble me with your devotion.

Although my life will go on, life would not be the same without you. Your dedication and unconditional care for me keeps me vibrant and nurtures my very core. The sustenance and protection I give you seems little reward for your servitude. Still the gardener serves the tree from her heart and the tree gives to her heart all that he can!

I am planted firmly on the ground and cannot follow you if you walk away from me.... But be assured I will survive. One hundred years later and two of your lifetimes; I will still be there, waiting for you in the same spot to offer you all that I do now.

Stay with me and be my gardener. You cannot get lost in me for we are complementary to each other. I am your devotion, and you give meaning to my existence. Apart we live life and survive; together we bloom eternally!

... As the Master finished his last words the sub cried herself to sleep at his feet. That night, he stood planted there like the Olive tree offering her his unconditional love and protection as she slept. As she would tend to him with her devotion the next day... and everyday thereafter!

The Olive Tree Part II-Return To The Olive Tree

Her Master had once taken her fears away and made her submissive resolve strong with a simple parable of an Olive tree. She had served him for many years and everyday something that happened to her or her Master brought her back to the simple but instructive story he had related to her. Life was as he said, he was the strong immovable Olive tree, majestic and powerful, but in the end totally dependent on her for its optimum health. She, its devoted gardener, always gained the sweet fruit from her tree and the comforts of its shade, the heat of its dried branches, and the loving strength of its massive trunk. She had learned the lesson that without each other they survived life, but did not live life to the fullest.

It came to be, as with any relationship of increasing enlightment, that she reached a point where she needed to commit her entire life to the devotion of her Master. In order to grow at the same pace as he was growing her submission needed to grow to its natural conclusion. She needed to give up all control, however small, to her Master.

Although they were very close and had very few diverging goals in life, they had some disagreements from time to time and she was allowed to hold on to her limits and decide when she was ready to push them. Her Master was very understanding and allowed her such freedoms. He had never pushed her limits until she was ready and she was very trustful of his intuition when he decided it was time. He had gotten her over so very many limits and made her happier and freer after each and every one of them! But now, the moment of truth that every submissive wishing the ultimate gift of submission must face was here—it was time to relinquish all her power to her Master. No longer could she hold her limits, she must hand them over to her Master to hold. She could no longer allow herself certain liberties that she jealously guarded; she had to hand them over to her Master. In short, she was to be a complete slave, with no rights and no limits of her own. The mere thought terrorized her.

She had danced around this subject with her Master for many months now and she could not bring herself to this pivotal point in her submissive devotions. She was afraid to lose herself in the submission, she was terrorized that as she could no longer say "no" and he would force her to face all her limits and force her to abandon them before she was ready. Even if he had been so good at knowing when she was ready to face and challenge her limits before, it was always she who decided to release them from her store of limits, now he would hold them and they did not belong to her. She was alone without any walls, without any privacy, she was totally naked before him. Her fears started that flight response that lead her to the Olive Tree parable before as she thought that giving up all control was unbearable and she needed to protect herself by running away.

Her Master had been quite patient and explained that sometimes in life we had to be "forced" to face a life altering change as fear and other factors often held us back from improving our lives. That sometimes we simply could not stall anymore and had to take a plunge of faith into the unknown—very often to find out that our fears were unfounded and that our new elevated state of enlightment was such pleasure that we could imagine what held us back.

When we are forced into a corner by life we either sink or swim, and sometimes when we do not think we can swim, we become Olympic swimmers as our taste for life is so strong, and in swimming so hard we discover a new passion for what it is we were trying to avoid. And so that point had arrived for her, she needed to take the plunge of faith and relinquish even the most insignificant control issues to her Master. She needed to become a complete slave.

He also explained that although it seems so stupid to argue over something so intangible and seemingly trivial as who holds on to her limits the mere thought of her holding on to her limits is in itself a form of control and holds her back from completing her submissive devotions. But, her biggest fear of losing these limits were really unfounded. When a Master holds something as potentially devastating to a submissive’s mental well being as her limits, he must himself show the strength of his complete power over her life by knowing and judging when, if ever, a limit will be pushed or dismissed. His care over that which she cared for before, has to be even more than hers. Since in a consensual D/s relationship the submissive holds on to the most important power of all, the Master must assure that she does not dethrone him if he abuses his powers. Her Master’s holding her limits did not mean that they would be violated without her consent, but it did mean that the burden they created in her are released from her shoulders and her life is free to devote more of her soul and mind to her submissive devotions and therefore complete her journey of enlightment. With her keeping even one gram of control, she is not as light and free to focus enough to raise in submissive levels.

Even with all this care and the incredible trust she bestowed upon him, the submissive was still ready to bolt in terror of the unknown even if every gram of her soul and mind and body wanted this freedom and this final step. And so the Master, once again patiently made her kneel before him and as the memory of the first story flashed instantly in her mind, he began to open his arms as before to appear as the majestic Olive tree she adored…….

My gardener, in the bad season that has beseeched us this year you have been so loyal next to me. You have toiled so hard to keep me vibrant and alive in better condition than all other trees around me. You have proven your devotion beyond your own expectations. But now that the water has dried out, now that I am at great risk of dying, you must trust me more than ever. You must walk blindly and trust me to help you find the water I desperately need to live and feed you the golden fruit on my branches.

You are tired, frustrated, and dejected by the difficulties that mother earth has brought upon us. You are holding back a little water reserve to help yourself in case the worse happens. You have the water that I need saved for yourself and you are so afraid to let it go as your fear of death is so strong. But my love, I need the water to give you all that I give you. I need to hold the water in my roots so that my fruits are healthy and nutritious for you.

I need to receive the sacrifice of all that is you and all that you own. I need your complete and unwavering trust. Together we will make it! When the thirst ravages you as the thirst ravages me now, I will teach you ways to quench it from what I provide you. When the sun bakes your skin, with the water that you surrender to me I will be able to offer you the shade you will need. When other plants cannot give you the nourishment you require, the water will make my fruit still sweet and nutritious. By holding nothing back for yourself you save two lives and you forge the trust of a lifetime.

My gardener, I love you more than life itself, even if my request may seem as selfish as you are for withholding the water from me. But understand that what I know will save us both and bring us even closer. Sure your thirst will not be quenched as fast as if you drank the water directly, but the struggle you will endure will let you taste all of me and give you the reward of your submission to me. What may seem like I am putting myself first will show you its truth soon enough. You have trusted me many time before, trust me now when my request seems unreasonable and when everything you believe and know seems upside down.

As you give me all that you own, as you lay naked, vulnerable, and literally put your life in my branches; know in your heart that your tree lives for you. That your tree risks all for you. What seems selfish is only wisdom turning the world upside down and causing what seems a sacrifice to turn into an eternal union bonded by the strongest trust! Remember that my trust for you is ever so complete. I stand naked without holding anything back from you each and every second that father time breathes into existence. I stand defenseless to your tools that can cut my roots and offer me a slow withering death or to your whim that can leave me die without the water I need so desperately, I am and forever will be at your mercy. Without your defense insects and choking weeds will eventually kill me and bird and marauding humans will destroy my branches to get to my fruit. I ask you to bear all of your trust on me, but it is not without doing the same things for you that I ask this. I am as bare before you, as trusting, as completely at your mercy; as I ask you to be for me. No matter how big and strong and vibrant my life has been with your care, I have always been and will always be at your mercy. You guide my life as surely as you breathe the air that fills your lungs. Yet I trust you and give you my fruit and my wood and my shade and my pride. I am at your mercy always, trust me and grow strong enough to give me everything—through your gift we will both survive this drought.

Yes, I know that you cannot imagine how giving me the water will help you. The well where you draw the water is almost empty and surely the water will not last me as long as it will last you. But I guarantee you, that I will show you how we will both survive and live life beyond this season and for many more. Trust me and follow me as you must know now that I will always do my best for you. I will never take what you are so fearful to give up and turn it against you. Without understanding what I intend to do, I am asking you to grow with me and give me your trust. Sure I could explain everything to you and make sense and you will see that I am right and that I am not being selfish. You will see how your apparent sacrifice is only a logical move. I could tell you how your surrender to trusting me so completely will bring us closer as you taste all of me and love even more of me than you thought you could before. But, I want to show you all these things so that you feel it, not know it; so you experience it not think it; so your entire being remembers it, not just your mind.

With a bowed head ashamed for her lack of trust, the gardener surrender her water and the tree taught her a love she could not imagine. To conserve the water she toiled long and hard to expose his roots so that the proper roots absorb the most water that could be absorbed and therefore stretch the little water remaining. To her amazement even that little water kept the tree strong and it was the greenest and most fertile tree in the valley. With his splendor he had her lick and all the leaves in his strongest branches to gather the due that laid upon them on the evenings. Then conserve her energy during the day by shading her with the very leaves her water kept green and on the branches. His fruit still moist and nourishing fed her well. Her adoration of his leaves brought her so close to him, he saved her life with the water he could gather but not drink and he made her so much closer to him—she discovered parts of him that she had never thought were there. She had new nooks and crannies to that she loved to squeeze into and feel all his leaves and branches cradle her as a strong man holds his woman in his arms. Her thirst was not quenched completely or immediately as if she had drunk the water from the well, but she found a new thirst for life and a new appreciation of the tree’s wisdom and guidance. She was freer by working harder to quench her thirst than by getting it all at once from the well, since she not only appreciated the water more but also discovered more things about her wonderful tree. After the drought was over she still found herself often gathering the due from her tree to keep her ever so close. She found that even though she could always take control of the water back when the water was plentiful, she did not need to. She did not want to. She had a greater appreciation for life and a greater appreciation for the tree that could have explained everything to her and made the experience a lesson to be soon forgotten—but instead risked his own life to teach her a lifelong lesson and make her trust of him so complete. He taught her with the deep lesson that only experience can teach that letting go that which seemed insane to give up, was the best thing she ever did for her tree lived and provided for her even more, he taught her and got her so close to him that she could hardly stop back the tears of appreciation every time she thought about it. The wise tree she chose to follow and care for, the wise tree that she was one with, the wise tree that she trusted so completely as to never question nor fear…for he was the wise tree that always put her first!

The submissive did not get all the lessons of this most complicated parable but she did gain the understanding that her Master was wise enough to take all her power, guide her life, and put her first!

The Olive Tree Part III-The Rebirth

You have served me for so many years my gardener and although some seasons have been hard for both of us, I am strong and virile and your gardening skills are so much greater than when you first tended to me. Even though you have toiled hard to care for me and your human life is so short compared to mine, I can see the vitality of my appreciation and the fruit of my love coursing through your old body. Your life is nearly over and you have not only served me but multiplied me by planting my children throughout the valley to show your devotion to me. My children and I cannot be prouder of what you have done for us. Now old and unable to do everything that you used to, it is time for you to rest. I feel your heart contented by your life of servitude and I also feel your need to stay with me and serve me until your body turns to ash and feeds my roots, but I also feel your need to walk alone and release the burden of your care for a while. I know you will return to give me your life essence before you pass but you are afraid you may not make it back if you wander from me. But look into your heart my caring gardener and see the strength that lies there, see the courage and wisdom that lies there. In your service you have gained from my eternal existence, you have gained from the wisdom my fruit transferred to you. You are more than you have imagined you are.

Walking alone without the thought is me will be hard and scary as your life’s devotion to me is ingrained in your soul. But when you walk from me, you walk with me inside you. Your body has been fed and maintain by the gifts of my fruit and your heart strengthened by the wisdom of my life. When you leave me, the care of my children will be upon you, no matter where you go in the valley, and when you leave the valley, the stores of my fruit you take with you will keep me in you for a long while. You never walk alone.

Take this time to find all that you have not seen while serving me, discover all the little things you never knew that you knew. See what gifts I have given you while you toiled beneath me, while you lived for me. Yours was a life of complete devotion and your devotion made you focus only on me, but my many lifestimes of wisdom have taught you without your knowledge. All that you needed to know about life my gardener, I have taught you. Your life was not easy but it was simple and with little worry. While you worked on trimming my branches your mind quietly pondered things that few enlightened humans have discovered. As you added fertilizer to my roots you imagined things beyond your age. As you rested from your toils my branches fanned you with the wisdom of ages which I carry inside me. Now that you will be traveling away from me, all that you thought you had not seen or known will be a wonderful surprise to you. The mysteries you thought you were to discover in your wanderings, you will discover were long ago realized by you. And every new discovery and re-discovery will bring you closer to me as you see that your life was not wasted in your service to me. That you were not as sheltered as you thought. That you lived beyond the confinement of my world and beyond the lands of this valley. Sure you did not see the beauty of the world outside this valley and you missed out on some aspects of life as no life can be fully complete, but all that your lifeforce needed during this lifestime you received in good doses. I have not been the end-all done-all of life, but through your devotion you have filled your soul with immense love, joy, and surprisingly with immense wisdom. That you have lead such a fulfilling life will be revealed by your journey. Proved by the wisdom beyond your age that you carry with you!

And so when your tired body comes back to rest for its final time before my trunk, I will blanket your cold body with my falling leaves and your body will become an eternal part of me as your soul freed from this world will go discover the endless wonders of the universe and perhaps settle down on a beautiful butterfly that comes pollinate my flowers again, or if the universe sees how truly advanced you are, perhaps you will be borne to a seed in my fruit which will become my most beautiful daughter who will train another wonderful gardener over many many lifestimes. My gardener fear not the wonders to come and sleep your sweet eternal sleep as what belies ahead of you is miraculous and no matter where the universe takes you, when my trunk withers and returns to mother earth, my soul will seek you to dance our dance until father time breaths his last second—together, you and me, life after life.

(Author Unknown)

Outlook of BDSM and M/s by Alex Giacobini

When a person watches BDSM or a M/s relationship from a objective standpoint one often assumes that it is merely the physical control of one person over the other. That one person is forced to submit and the other asserts control. The truth of the matter is that BDSM and M/s are far from a objective thing. It is not a end, but rather a means to an end.

In any relationship the couple must have a bond, a connection. For some that is cuddling on a porch watching the sun set, for others fondly kneeling at the Feet of their Dom. BDSM in this case is a means of showing love for each other, one through their submission to their Master. The other through the thoughtful and respectful domination of their sub. And of course not only is it a means, it is a means that many enjoy at a level that is hard to explain.

BDSM is not about Control.

Furthermore, BDSM is not about force and control. Those are poor words to use. Any sub or slave should willingly do what their Dom orders. However by no means are they forced to obey. They have the choice.  And sometimes are punished for "wrong" choices. However this is something that they take on willingly. They trust in their Dom's to  punish them for a reason....not to simply punish them.

Trust. This is the Foundation of Domination.  A Dom must trust his sub to do as he wishes in his prescence and when alone. And a sub must trust her dom to care for her, not to treat her unfairly...and to care for her heart. 

Respect in BDSM and M/s

Respect This is another cornerstone of Domination. A sickening number of Masters and Doms in SL believe that slaves are here to serve as their personal doormats, whether physically, emotionally, or mentally. Sometimes all three. I have seen a lot of variety in this particular abuse of M/s.

Some obvious, punishment of a slave who doesn't enjoy it for the sake of some sadistic pleasure on the part of the Master. I cannot argue with the fact that a Master has that right, but it is a abuse. You will find plenty of people here that love the punishment for the punishment, find them.

Some not so obvious to those that are new to M/s here. One such thing is what I like to call the 'Catch and release method." This is namely those Masters who feel the need to have a slave for a few days or weeks and than release them to find another. A sub friend of mine once surmised it like this, and I agree. "Most Masters here collar a slave to claim exclusive rights over the avatar he sees. He cares not for the person behind the screen, he cares not for the feelings of her....he merely wants what he can claim as his own..and when he gets bored she gets let go." This is one of the attitudes that really, aggervates me. One can never forget the person who controls the avatar.

Another are those Dom's who own 2,3,4,14,58 slaves. I do not deny that you can have a slave family in SL. I in fact own two lovely girls. However one must always consider the girls when you have such a family. For instance, if one decides he wants another slave he should consider his current slave girls. Having 5 girls might sound like a great idea. But can cause a lot of heartache for the Dom or the subs should one not consider them. They do matter, and only a foolish Dom would consider taking their slaves opinion as weak.

Furthermore....I will say this. TRUTH is the most important thing in a slave family. Be honest with your slaves, and if they are honest with you it will work. Otherwise it is a diaster waiting to happen.

Freedoms and Restrictions in BDSM and M/s

This is one area even I must admit to have some issues. As a Master one has the authority to literally make her do his will. Whether to restrict her to him only, or to make her have sex with every person who asks. I have seen both. The only advice I can offer to slaves and Doms in SL is that it totally depends on the pair. Some girls like to be totally restricted, they like that protection and adherence to their Dom only. And on the flipside some are giddy over the thought that their Master has made it so they are subject to any person. And that they submit to their Master's will in that respect. You must be careful in the rules or orders you make your slave obey. They will reflect on you in the end, your slave will know her place based on these things. And if you give her rules not fitting for her in the end both the Dom and the sub will be hurt. The only caution I offer is to make sure that one is respectful of any such choice and to remember the saying.......

If you love a person let them go....if they love you they'll come back if not they were never yours.

(Not suggesting that you literally release them but you should get the idea)

Lists in SL BDSM and M/s.

I FULLY support this, have your slave fill out a "On and Off, Do's or Dont's, Kinks List. This is a good way to know where you can push and where you cannot. I will post one here as a example. Consider this a type of safeword replacement in SL. However safewords are still a good idea as well.

��

Mastering in BDSM and M/s.

I'll say it as it is. I have not met a slave or sub on SL who has not had a shitty, disrespectful and unsatisfying Dom. I will not say I have never screwed up as a Master. I have, but I am glad to say that most of the slaves I have lost were more to timezones or other uncontrolable things. And that they still keep in contact with me, and that some even still kneel to me.

Mastering is a combination of many important things.

1. The ability to know what a sub needs.

2. The ability to Dom without being overbearing.

3. The ability to put a slaves needs above your own should she need it.

4.The ability to respect hard limits, and knowing if to push soft ones.

5. And finally the ability to accept that a slave is human, and she will never be perfect.

Those who expect a slave to follow orders perfectly and punish a girl for what amounts to a small crime is a sad and apparent truth in SL.

This is my notecard on what I believe in the Foundations of Domination, and it is not complete in any sense of the word. But this is for those Dom's who know that BDSM has a bad name in SL because of other Dom's who can't Dom, and for those slaves and subs who have been hurt to know that there is hope. That there are Dom's out there who do care, who can Dom. Give this note to those who wish to learn, those you wish to teach, or those who need a little inspiration.

Alex Giacobini

 I was given this by my friend Alex. I feel his words are very wise in all matters of the aspects stated above. I love you Alex, and despite your RL taking over so much, you still hold a special place in my heart.